“It’s very puzzling… we thought we lesbians are safe”
Possibly infected them. All of these participants reported that they had never ever been with male lovers or had contact with medical transmissions or drug that is injecting (we would not ask if individuals had been born with HIV or other feasible risks of transmission). Although hard for them all to know, truly the only possible path of transmission and high-risk behaviour they could report had been intercourse along with other females. All individuals additionally reported they had been surprised to learn they have been infected with HIV and may maybe not know the way it had occurred. That they had all thought that they were safe because they had only been with women:
“…i possibly couldn’t know the way it simply happened I thought we (lesbians) are safe, and the only person I was sexually active with was also a female because I was fine and. I really couldn’t comprehend… I really couldn’t realize. I really couldn’t know the way I really could have contracted the herpes virus whenever I had thought I happened to be safe in a real method! ” Zanele, 31 yrs old, Durban
“It’s how you get diseased as a lesbian since it’s actually confusing exactly just just how you are able. Other females understand from their partners during penetrative sexual activity then again as a female that is a lesbian whom also sleeps along with other females – it is rather confusing. They obtain it” Lebo, 22 yrs old, Pretoria
The individuals’ confusion and disbelief is obvious through the above examples. Within the quote that is first Zanele repeats just just how she “couldn’t understand” being HIV infected. This feeling of confusion and very nearly perhaps maybe perhaps not believing that certain is HIV good ended up being a recurring theme for the five individuals whom reported exclusive intimate associates with feamales in their life time. It stays ambiguous for most of them just exactly how feasible transmission could happen between females.
For those participants, coping with HIV demands constant explanations of how one got contaminated as assumptions override lived realities. Not just are individuals not able to comprehend feasible illness on their own, they simultaneously battle to respond to constant questions from other people about how precisely they are often contaminated:
“People think you got HIV that you have slept with a man and that’s how. It creates my entire life much harder because as a lesbian girl whom is HIV positive, i must explain the way I got HIV. ” Bongi, 33 yrs old, Johannesburg
“In the city they raise many questions regarding the very fact that i will be a lesbian and once they see…my partner is a lady. Then, `how did I be HIV good once I have always been someone who really https://camsloveaholics.com/sexier-review/ loves other ladies? ‘ they ask. Some also get so far as saying it’s not surprising I ever heard that a lady and another woman is included? That i’ve HIV – where have actually” Gugu, 30 yrs old, Durban
It really is obvious through the above quotes that their HIV status that is positive different problems within the everyday lives among these females. The demand that is constant explain a person’s status to other people shows that you may still find misconceptions about HIV transmission in conjunction with lack of knowledge about same-sex relations.
Determining to reveal
Individuals had been additionally asked should they had disclosed their status to anybody aside from the interviewer. Reactions suggest that the majority of individuals had disclosed up to somebody, some loved ones and few buddies. But, a participants that are few just disclosed to 1 or two other people. Some had disclosed to family unit members, buddies and in addition publicly. On the list of individuals had been a couple of AIDS activists who have been understood inside their communities to be residing freely with HIV. For all participants who had disclosed to family unit members and buddies, disclosure had been couched when you look at the language of protection – i.e. Protecting yourself and another from feasible disease:
“As i’d like to safeguard the second individual, we nevertheless need certainly to perform some same for myself. I might nothing like to have re-infected…As very long as you continue having non-safe sex, you are able to nevertheless get re-infected. ” Zintle, 22 yrs old, Pretoria
“My mom as well understands (about my HIV status) because if we collapse in front side of her she have to know that she must utilize gloves to greatly help so she will not be contaminated” Gugu, 30 yrs old, Durban
While individuals may shy far from disclosing into the public, all reported the need and significance of disclosing to intimate lovers. Central to such disclosure is protecting somebody and ensuring she doesn’t get diseased:
“Most regarding the lovers that I happened to be dating – a lot of them are now HIV negative and we just be sure that they’ll always stay HIV negative. I mightn’t risk their everyday lives and We just be sure that I would personallyn’t do just about anything…” Taati, 26 yrs old, Windhoek
