hello and welcome thank you for watching this fantastic video all about sex is your teenager having sex at this time and you're not knowing it well I'm asking the question because if you don't know then you don't know are we blinded for what we don't want to hear about our kids are they doing drugs are they having sex are they doing alcohol are they getting good grades for revenge because they're not happy I'm gonna tell you a little story when my son was going through high school and now he's 26 years old he was at ninety eight point eight average in all of his classes he was valedictorian he had all the knowledge necessary to be successful but he wanted to commit suicide he did marijuana he drank alcohol why because he thought to be successful was to good good grades my belief was he was getting good grades to show me revenge he wanted to say I'm successful and you're not I'm smoking alcohol or I'm smoking marijuana and doing alcohol because I want to hurt you because you're not a very good father you don't understand my feelings at that point he didn't I didn't understand his feelings tell you the truth I did not understand his feelings I thought by him getting good grades that everything was fantastic in his life if he got good grades I paid him was that the right thing to do now thinking later I was using money to control his happiness I was using for him to get good grades to control his success in life he turned to drugs why because I didn't listen to the science of revenge I didn't want to listen to his voice because I didn't want to listen to my voice about why I was doing this parenting the same way that my parents did but if he's okay if he's just ok that I'm ok wrong absolutely wrong now I understand personally I understand that wasn't the right path because at that time I had no idea I was a single father but no excuse I had an issue I was smoking marijuana I was drinking why because I was hiding my pains so how can I see his pains when I was hiding my own pains doesn't make sense right as parents as human beings we go through life with a sort of blinders on and when were a kid we want attention from our parents we want love we want acceptance and when we don't get it we said revenge means do drugs get straight A's do drinking get in fights I was doing all of that for revenge against my parents because they didn't want to accept they didn't want to listen to my feelings so I passed it along because I didn't care because I didn't know how to care because I was brought up of big boys don't cry suck it up buttercup everything will be just fine tell you the truth it wasn't fine it wasn't okay and it's not okay to suppress your pains by using alcohol drugs fighting getting straight A's now I can think about it and understand it what I was doing because I'm starting to accept those issues that I had my life now I can see in hindsight what was going on in my family life what was going on in my family life as a father and later on now with a another son that 16 years old now I can understand his feelings using the I am statements I'm so happy to watch you play sports I'm so happy to watch you grow as a young man accepting what he's doing instead of hiding what he's doing it's a powerful powerful feeling when you accept and listen to your child when they're speaking to you fantastic feeling those moments of joy in your life that you feel connected with yourself to your son to your wife to your family your friends to life to nature connect yourself find yourself and if you're searching for that answer searching for that solution find a coach find a mentor and if you're asking a friend that's in the same situation that doesn't understand your feelings then you're asking yourself the same question because that's to yourself but if you get outside sort up feelings and thoughts and understandings then you can look within so everybody have a great day look when in yourself looking yourself in the mirror and ask yourself do I accept you for who you are do I understand your feelings and I'm talking about Marse ourselves looking in the mirror and asking ourselves questions do I love you do I care for you will a stand strong forever for you well and listen to every feeling that you're feeling listen to your inner voice let's listen to your gut feeling when it tells you something so have a great day and create the life that you've always wanted and desired bye bye everyone bye bye
